I've become ashamed of myself in all regards.

I don't leave the house because I'm afraid.
I used to feel like walking away to somewhere, anywhere I might belong.

I feel like I don't belong anywhere.

I wish I could convey what this was.
Some set of symptoms to cure...
some idea of the true nature of the problem so that you could swoop in and tell me everything I do wrong.

That's not going to happen though.

I am inconceivably idiotic.
Shit shit shit.
Mistake mistake mistake.