I apparently need to write my father a letter.

My grandma is undergoing hospice care.
He's leaving this weekend to be with her.

I'm contemplating going up there to visit while I help my mother.

I'm also contemplating the ramifications of saying fuck you to both of them and dealing with my own shit while I can.

This anger reminds me of Anakin Skywalker & Harry Potter.
Anakin is described as having a dragon in his heart. Growing & spitting fire, it consumes him.
Harry is pretty fucking emo but he's always saying shit like: "I'm just so angry all the time."

I know fighting won't solve anything.
I know it is a lesser way of resolving conflict.
I know there is a better way.